Growing up, one adage that I knew to be true was that you absolutely do not ask a woman her age. It was always something to be coy about—the implication being that not only was it intrusive to ask, but that it’s best not to put the woman in the uncomfortable situation where either she is might be judged … or might lie. Age was always the elephant in the room but as Bob Dylan said … 🎵 the times they are a’changing 🎶 .
More and more women are getting comfortable embracing and sharing their age with pride and I think it’s due in large part to the fact that women have begun to redefine what it means to age on our own terms. Whether it’s through skincare routines, health regimens, or simply the choice to flaunt our silver strands (or not), modern women are moving beyond outdated stereotypes and now have the freedom to define our own narratives.
How Turning 50 Used to Look
When I was a young girl, 50+ year old women always looked a specific way. I’m sure you’ve seen the memes about the Golden Girls, or remember from the show, Dorothy, Rose and Blanche were women in their 50s. In this formative time in my girlhood when I was watching the show (I was 10 when it came out in 1985), they looked like my grandmothers and were active like my grandmothers but the reason it stands out so much now is that through today’s lens they look much older.
I’m turning 50 in a few months, I can’t help but think about what it must have been like during that time, and feeling like that was the embodiment of being in your 50s.
How Turning 50 Has Changed
Over the years, the portrayal of aging has certainly changed. 10 years ago The Today Show put together a slideshow of being in your 50s “then and now” that showed stark contrast, especially among the women. One notable celebrity featured was Courteney Cox alongside Aunt Bee from The Andy Griffith show.
In an interview in 2013 in New You magazine Cox herself spoke about aging. The interviewer noted that there were a number of shows at the time where the main character was in her 40s or 50s (Cox was starring on the show Cougar Town) to which Cox attributed that to, “I feel like no one really looks their age anymore.” Further in the article, she talks about her fear of turning 50 and also her use of anti-aging products including injectables, which at the time was not often openly discussed, especially among celebrities.
Fast forward to today—certainly there will always be people who feel it’s no one’s business to know their age and they might even lie about it for fear it could jeopardize their careers, relationships, etc., but it’s becoming more common that women are proudly saying their age and embracing it because more women are aging on their own terms. There is no longer one look that represents a specific age.
Today, celebrities will endorse and host infomercials talking about anti-aging products that give them “confidence in my body and certainly my skin” (Jane Seymore for Crepe Erase). They will also stand outside the US Capitol shouting to a crowd, “I’m in menopause, OK?” and insisting that “the shame has to be taken out of menopause. We have to talk about this very normal part of our life that happens. Our doctors can’t even say the word to us, let alone walk us through the journey,” (Halle Berry in May 2024).
Today’s woman has space to age as she wants to—injectables and menopause hormone treatments are spoken of together around the coffee shop, not whispered quietly about in line for the Ladies Room. There’s no one “right” way to be 50—or any age, for that matter.
Personally, my 50 will include creams and serums, hair color (spoiler alert, I’m not naturally red), green drinks, hopefully a few more marathons and conversations with my friends about the current state of my perimenopause journey. But I can confidently say that those products and my wardrobe aren’t about some quest to be perceived as young because I’ll tell anyone who asks my age. And then again, maybe someday I’ll want gorgeous silver hair or to wear glasses all the time, but I love that now it’s up to me.
Your 50 will look totally different from mine—and how cool is that?! Each of us has the opportunity to create our own path forward … and to own it.
Hey, yeah … 50 is the new 50!
Share your own experiences and insights about turning 50 and beyond. —Tam
